Tuesday, December 23, 2003
Predicament
Coming home from a night out friends has proved to be fun and frustrating.
Fun, because I was able to hang out with my dear friends. Frustrating, because I was totally uncomfortable/bored with our surroundings at the bar.
I know I've talked about this before, how I don't like going to certain places (read:typical "frat" bar) but end up going to them. Girls don't talk to me, and I'm not really interested.
I told a friend that I feel more comfortable out in LA, which surprised my friend, as well as myself. maybe because of the racial dynamics I am less paranoid about girls not talking to me etc.. because I seem to be able to socialize alot better in LA even though it is very image conscious.
which leaves me to a predicament....although I miss KC, I know for a fact that this city has nothing for me. Outside my friends, family, and a select assortment of places in KC, I could care less about KC.
Now for LA, I have some friends, some family, amazing diversity and other things that make me like LA very much.
But, I don't love LA and of course LA and I have some issues.
Even though I feel more comfortable and I have a stronger sense of belonging to LA compared to KC, I still don't know if LA is the right place to be.
At one point, it is comforting that I can move to different places without much stress b/c I have no family commitments etc..
I guess I just hope to find my place one of these days...thats all...just a place where I can feel happy, comfortable and satisfied..
well..thats about it.... sorry about the rambling on...
¶ 12/23/2003 11:06:00 PM
Coming home from a night out friends has proved to be fun and frustrating.
Fun, because I was able to hang out with my dear friends. Frustrating, because I was totally uncomfortable/bored with our surroundings at the bar.
I know I've talked about this before, how I don't like going to certain places (read:typical "frat" bar) but end up going to them. Girls don't talk to me, and I'm not really interested.
I told a friend that I feel more comfortable out in LA, which surprised my friend, as well as myself. maybe because of the racial dynamics I am less paranoid about girls not talking to me etc.. because I seem to be able to socialize alot better in LA even though it is very image conscious.
which leaves me to a predicament....although I miss KC, I know for a fact that this city has nothing for me. Outside my friends, family, and a select assortment of places in KC, I could care less about KC.
Now for LA, I have some friends, some family, amazing diversity and other things that make me like LA very much.
But, I don't love LA and of course LA and I have some issues.
Even though I feel more comfortable and I have a stronger sense of belonging to LA compared to KC, I still don't know if LA is the right place to be.
At one point, it is comforting that I can move to different places without much stress b/c I have no family commitments etc..
I guess I just hope to find my place one of these days...thats all...just a place where I can feel happy, comfortable and satisfied..
well..thats about it.... sorry about the rambling on...
¶ 12/23/2003 11:06:00 PM
