....

takin a break from the blogger for a while, email me if you wanna
  ¶ 1/30/2005 02:27:00 PM 0 comments

  Chat room conversation with myself

Alex: you need to get out of this funk you're in.... snap out of it... life is good... no one said it wouldn't be hard...but, like the Desiderata says "there will always be people above and below you, take comfort in that"

Alex: yeah man, quit your whining, that homeless guy on the corner, has it way worse than you..quit whining. try standing outside with a sign all day...you'll forget about stupid shit

Alex: you probably should just go to sleep and hopefully wake up feeling better. your lack of sleep has probably made you a bit more sensitive to stuff, plus, you are eating like shit and haven't taken your vitamins... god knows how bad all that caffiene is that you are drinking

Alex: you are all right, I think I'll do all that...and then some... LOL, ROFTL, TTYL :) ;) :?


i'mgoing craaaazzzyyyyy






Alex, Alex, Alex, Alex
  ¶ 1/25/2005 08:45:00 PM 0 comments

  so, i'm sitting here, lunch time..and i'm feeling pretty good

vegas was pretty great. I love being around family, esp when the family is paying your way in vegas!

suffice to say, I made no money, but my parents made a bunch, essentially paying for the trip...

its amazing how diferent you are treated if you are percieved to have money.. by simply acting the part, my stepmom got us into restaurants faster and received extra attention...its amazing...

I on the other hand could never pull that stuff with authenticity and confidence, people would know at the get go that I am scamming them.

seeing my parents definately quelled my homesickness, although, it was kind of sad driving back to LA.. luckily my cousin Walter was there to wallow in our sadness together.

i doubt I'd ever actually go to vegas by myself... going with family is much more fun..and economic...

vegas on one end is a marvel, a getaway for all economic types, but the socioeconomic divisions are clearly marked in this town. if you even dress better, you get invited to things one would not have been invited to if he/she were not dressed a certain way.

vegas is basically an extreme version of america's obsession with consumerism... I can't say its all bad, since i took part in it all..
for every gucci or prada store, there are the virtually non-existent homeless people..vegas cops do a bang up job keeping them off the streets (dare a tourist see one!) ..you wonder what they do with them..for every economcially viable las vegas resident, I bet there are two folks who aren't as fortunate.. the public school systems arent great..
the bright lights of the strip casts a cold dark shadow on the problems of the city..

its really sad...
but, i still partook, I played the games, had the drinks, ate the food (I recommend Spago at Caesars Palace for dinner, the bakery at Paris for amazing pastries, the AVA lounge at the Mirage for good live jazz and strong drinks)

I really would like to travel more in this country and abroad... perhaps Its time for a change of scenery......
  ¶ 1/24/2005 12:23:00 PM 0 comments

  i really want to write about my weekend trip to vegas with family..but i'm not really in the mood yet..i know you all are waiting on my every word out there.but you'll have to be patient..


I had too much fun, i'll tell you that..and my parents are harder partiers than I ever will be
  ¶ 1/23/2005 07:28:00 PM 0 comments

  i've just been called a "sexy teacher"

it isn't the worst thing I could have been called. but, c'mon the words "sexy and teacher" really shouldn't go together.

but, the worst part about it.... it came from a student.......(shudders)

do I need to switch to elementary? being around hormonal kids often makes me uncomfortable..
  ¶ 1/19/2005 11:03:00 AM 0 comments

  i just realized how much crap I've accumulated these past few years.

comic books
cd's
scraps of paper
records
various garage sale bought electronics
lesson plans
curriculum books
stickers
writing instruments
household tools
office furniture
old magazines
photographs

When the time comes to move, i'm gonna have one hell of a garage sale
  ¶ 1/14/2005 01:16:00 PM 0 comments

  i really don't want to go to class tonight. A full day of school is enough. What more do I need to expose myself to?

its cold, but, bearable, I just came from missouri, so it is definately not as cold as over there.
but, it just sucks you think "sunny california", and you have trouble keeping your toes warm in the morning.
  ¶ 1/13/2005 06:07:00 AM 0 comments

  Its so fucking cold over here. So cold in fact that they cancelled school. I forgot how that works. If it snows enough, or its too cold for the kids to wait for the bus, they cancel school. Its been a while since I had to scrape my windows or use my defroster to actually defrost!

Short of a strange biblical slew of hail in watts, or possibly some shootings, even then, they probably wouldn't cancel school at Markham.

It took me almost a whole day to brave the courage to drive out there. It just looked so scary and unwelcoming out there, but, wanting to see Sarah, I took a chance and drove. Not so bad, driving Erin's SUV made it easy. I don't think my civic would be able to handle it, but, I remember my tiny Nissan doing okay.

With my days in KC winding down, and my life back in LA resuming, I've been having some nasty intense little dreams. I'vehad everything from crazy classrooms, to movie-influenced life or death game shows. I guess my want to stay on break forever, combined with my recent slew of watching strange and violent movies is taking its toll on me.

You think with all my trips back and forth from LA to KC I'd get use to saying goodbye. Not a chance. The comfort I get from looking at her sleep, to holding her hand, to smelling her hair cannot be reproduced. Sure, phone calls and emails help, but, its but a respite from the real experience of her. I've been unfairly wanting to spend all of her free time with her, and I don't want to do that. It's just not a realistic situation. I appreciate her accomodating me though, she is a saint. Like she told me earlier, it is easier knowing that I will be back in KC, with her and my friends and family soon. This coming semester may seem long, but (cheesy shit coming up) love makes it easier to bear.

But, i'm gonna miss the hell out of LA. Even though I know it's not my town, there are some great things out there, many of which I have not gotten the chance to experience. So, at least, that will make it easier. I will try to get out and do some things, knowing that my time in LA is short, and try to stop and smell the flowers. I don't want work to ruin my last few months in LA. At least I can go to Lola's or Largo to see Jon Brion play every friday If needed. Plus, my cousin Walter is in the OC now, and I can go hang out with him. Not to mention my awesome LA friends, who I haven't been able to see much of lately. This will change this semester.

Anyways, i'll be back in town Sunday afternoon, the Lonely Hearts club of Jenn, Mark, and myself will be back in order. Anyone want to become a member? Lets get together.
Time to lesson plan.


  ¶ 1/07/2005 06:20:00 AM 0 comments

  by endurance, we conquer

more to write later

still in kansas city, mo and loving it..

need to see some friends still.. i'll make it!
  ¶ 1/02/2005 11:28:00 PM 0 comments